To all my foreign friends who might be confused by all the media circus that has been surrounding me and Ravi for the past week or so. Here is the full story: On April 1st me and Ravi applied for marriage licence.
In the light of my cancer diagnoses in the beginning of this year, we came to realise that chemotherapy could possibly make me infertile. Therefor we were in a sudden rush to get Ravi to Iceland as swiftly as possible so we could freeze embryos. But to be able to freeze embryos, we had to be married first. However two days before the day we had chosen for our marriage, which was my mothers birthday April 7th, the Icelandic bureaucracy put a stop to our marriage plans, stating that Ravi’s bachelorhood certificate wasn’t valid because it didn’t look like some divorce papers from south India that they had been recently given. It did not matter to them that Ravi’s paper was stamped by all valid authorities in India, including the Uttarakhand district court, Magistrates court in Delhi, the ministry of External affairs in India and the Indian Embassy in Iceland. We were lucky however that the IVF clinic sympathized with our situation and gave us permission to freeze embryos so that I could start my chemotherapy as quickly as possible, just as long as we would be married when the embryos would be implanted.
Following the decision of the Icelandic bureaucracy (Sýslumaðurinn í Reykjavík), we decided to challenge their decision, quoting Icelandic marriage law where it says that if one or both persons getting married are seriously ill, no extra paperwork should be required. With this we handed in a medical certificate from my doctor to back it up. However it took them more than 3 months to answer us and when we finally received their answer they denied us once again to marry. But now time was of the essence, because Ravi’s temporary work and resident permit were about to expire, which meant that he would have to return to India and stay there for 6 months while his application for his temporary work and resident permit was once again approved. That meant that for these 6 months he would not be able to be with me or come to me if anything would have happened, for example if my health would have taken a turn for the worst, he’d be stuck in India.
Desperate times require desperate measures. The injustice we were being dealt was too obvious to ignore. We knew we had the right papers, we were not about to give up, so we took it to the media. Straight away help started pouring in. One of the people offering their assistance was a great legal mind that saw the obvious miss justice in all of this and that Ravi’s papers were more than valid. He helped us sue the decision again and this time he took it straight to the Iceland’s Ministry of Internal affairs. The Ministry of Internal affairs did not only overrule the decision of the Sýslumaðurinn í Reykjavík, thus allowing us now finally to marry, but as well promised to reconsider their work process when it comes to evaluating foreign papers in situations such as these. So the victory we have been able to push trough with our persistence, will not only affect us Ravi, but many other in similar position that will follow. May justice always prevail!
Holding up with the Gharwali Hindu tradition that one can not celebrate any festivities within a year from a close relatives death, Ravi’s father in this case, who passed away from cancer in December last year. Our wedding ceremony which will take place this upcoming week, will be a simple low-key ceremony and there will be no proper wedding party celebrated until next year. Hopefully then my health will have improved.
Thank you everybody for your help, strength and support during this battle. It was greatly appreciated.